A few days ago I blogged about being the most inconsistent person in the universe.
I said I was okay with that…. but I’m reconsidering.
I think that I have always seen the word “consistent” to mean something good, but always as something that I couldn’t achieve. I happen to be, for better or worse, a person of extremes. I go all in, then I lose interest and drop completely out. I have done this with fitness, with hobbies, with topics that interest me, with TV shows… you name it. However, I have always seen consistency as meaning that once you decide to do something you just do it. And you don’t stop.
I have a good friend whom I have always considered to be the most consistent person I have ever met. She decides she is going to do something, and she just does it. And I watch in awe. I’ve seen her do this with running, with education, with photography…
Project 365, if you aren’t aware of it, is a photography project where you take a photo a day for a year. She started this project with me a while back, I dropped out after a few months, and she’s finishing up her THIRD YEAR!!! She took one look at that concept and said, “Project 365? Ha!! Try project 1095!! Bwahahaha!!”.
I’m not kidding when I say that I am absolutely in awe of this type of consistency. She’s amazing.
However, I think that I have always seen this as THE definition of consistency. And I have always paled in comparison. And since I see consistency as good, and I see this as the definition of consistency, I see my approach towards things as a failure. I failed at Project 365, just like I fail at other things in my life. Like I failed at fitness, because as soon as my schedule wouldn’t allow for my current level of activity, I used it as an excuse to give up altogether. Because when I attempted to document my year by taking a photo a day, I got angry and gave up when I missed just one photo.
I’m okay with being inconsistent when consistency has such a strict definition. That’s just not me. It’s not how I operate. And it’s okay to admit your weaknesses, so I’m cool with that. But I don’t think consistency necessarily has to have such a strict definition.
Instead of just accepting that I am “inconsistent”, I think I’m going to try and redefine the word “consistent”. I’m going to start viewing the term in a much broader context.
Instead of believing that I am a failure at photographically documenting my year by taking “a photo a day”, I’m going to accept that documenting my year might not require exactly 365 photos. If I end the year with 200 that give a clear and honest picture of my year… well… that’s good enough.
I don’t normally make New Years Resolutions, but I think this year I am going to try and be more “consistent”… just using the new definition, that’s all.